The scary washing machine saga!

We have had a TradeMe revolution of the last couple of days in Nz! Some clever man put an old washing machine up for sale and spun a big long winded story about its personality, ability to open portals to other worlds (where he glimpsed dinosaurs!) and even included some possible customization options! It was hilarious and super clever! He has now listed some of his dinosaur drawings for auction with all proceeds going to various children charity groups. I am a fan for sure!! Read the captions…completely off the wall!

“This is my favorite dinosaur, it eats vegetables but it will still waste you. Look at its horns and how sharp they are. This Triceratops has got cold feet from chasing Icelanders through the snow which is why it was looking for a warm volcano.
It was halfway to the volcano when it saw a weird porthole open with a naked man hanging off a deep-freeze screaming. Of course this was alien to the Triceratopss environment, it had never seen a man before let alone a nude one. This is what made the Triceratops angry because it was a bit scared and confused. When a Triceratops gets scared it will immediately try to waste the scary thing. I knew this from Geology so there was no way I was going to fall through the porthole.
Their weakness is behind their neck just like a terminator so if one comes through the porthole you need to get in there behind its head as fast as possible. Basically it will waste you if you are too slow.
I made the horns yellow because I wanted to highlight their sharpness, they can pretty much stab anything.”

“Watch out for this thing if it comes through the portal because its like a one-beast demolition squad.
It eats vegetables like the Triceratops but it is extremely easy to make one disgruntled enough to start swinging its spike-ball tail around. You cant climb on its back because it has a row of plates on its spine which are really sharp. Some scientists think the spines may also be poisonous, thats why I have drawn them orange as a warning not to lick them.
The Stegosauruss vulnerability is its own tail, if you are nimble enough you may be able to use yourself as a live target and trick it into stabbing its own head with the spike-ball tail. Bullfighting skills would be an advantage in this situation.
You can see this Stegosaurus is aware of his tails power as he is looking at it, you will have trouble tricking this one.
His spikes are standing up on his back because he has just seen a weird porthole open and an electric iron come flying through. He has never seen an iron before and does not know what to make of it, especially the chord which he thinks might be a tail like his. (he is looking at his own tail for reference) – Mikew4″

“Looks innocent enough until you see the size of the tree he is eating. (its a full size tree) Diplodocus is huge. If he somehow gets through the portal theres not a lot you can do. If he can eat a tree imagine what he can do to you and your loved ones. Look at his face, hes pretty tough for a vegetarian. He has just seen a portal open and he thinks its a new kind of tree he hasnt eaten yet. He probably wont even taste you, he eats monkeys by accident all the time.
He has equally large feet, each one the size of a car so if you get under them you will get wastified.
The Diplodocuss weakness is its sensitive hearing (a little known fact) and it size. You should be able to run around and around its legs with a rope like Luke Skywalker did on Starwars. If you bring it down make sure you are not under it and if you manage to kill it you will have a big clean up on your hands and people will be asking a lot of questions. Try if you can to herd it back into the portal by making lots of very loud noises.”

“Often underestimated as it is rubbish out of the water. If the washing machine opens into the ocean and one of these comes through youre probably screwed.
They have really long necks and have awesome night vision kind of like a bat crossed with a whale.
Even though they are basically immobile on the floor of your laundry the neck can still reach you all the way to the kitchen so if you are able to escape you will have to be fast.
I have also added a Shark because Sharks were around when dinosaurs were, the Shark has bitten the Plesiosaur but the Plesiosaur is about to waste the Shark its just that it has seen a porthole open and it is extremely confused as well as curious. Soon it will notice the Shark has bitten it and there will be an awesome battle but the Plesiosaur will win.”

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3 Responses to The scary washing machine saga!

  1. Munted kowhai says:

    oh my gosh this is too funny!way better than the guy who tried to sell his nail clippings on ebay

  2. leni says:

    those dinosaurs are so cute!

  3. Cynner says:

    awesome! kid has an actual "style" already! keep it up!